17: Patience: Practicing Quiet Progress

[Music Playing]

Jessica Armstrong (00:00):

Welcome to The Good Enough Podcast, a podcast that takes you into a new realm by inviting you to reduce your daily hustle and celebrate yourself right here.

McKenzie Raymond (00:14):

Tune in as we dive deep into vulnerable topics and interview guests who deliver transformative moments to you, our community of individuals healing on a collective journey.

Jessica Armstrong (00:25):

We’ll open up to the art of embodied self-care, and even on the days that you feel like a self-sabotaging rebel …

McKenzie Raymond (00:32):

We’re here to remind you that in this realm, we are all good enough.

McKenzie Raymond (00:38):

The views expressed on this episode as with all episodes of The Good Enough Podcast are solely host and guest opinions.

Jessica Armstrong (00:45)

This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice and is for entertainment purposes only.

McKenzie Raymond (00:53):

Hey, Jessica.

Jessica Armstrong (00:55):

Hi, McKenzie.

McKenzie Raymond (00:56):

Hello, everyone. We are so excited to be back here recording another amazing conversation for you.

McKenzie Raymond (01:04):

I have been blown away by the healing that I receive during our time together. It’s been one of the most surprising things about this whole journey. Creating a podcast is really how therapeutic these conversations are for me. So, thank you, Jessica, for being a part of them and holding this space.

Jessica Armstrong (01:26):

Thank you. I feel the same.

McKenzie Raymond (01:28):

Aw. Well, today, we are going to be diving into the topic of patience. And as I was just pondering this topic, really, I became more aware that I’ve had this belief for a very long time. It’s embedded at this point that patience is not my virtue.

McKenzie Raymond (01:50):

And this is something that I am completely open to changing. It’s something that I think I have been learning more about, and it has been an extremely challenging practice.

McKenzie Raymond (02:04):

And so, patience is my virtue, it’s all of our virtues. And I’m really open to seeing how I can learn more about patience and how again, this conversation can just continue to be this open healing experience.

Jessica Armstrong (02:23):

Yeah, absolutely. And such an amazing point, like in your vulnerability around that. I think a lot of times we don’t understand how everyone is struggling with patience and especially at different levels.

Jessica Armstrong (02:41):

And for me, patience is kind of the ultimate practice and it really does challenge every bit of you.

Jessica Armstrong (02:52):

And I’m excited to go into this topic with you because there’s a lot of important reasons that you and I personally really do try to focus on practicing this and really learning more from it and how we could even do it more often, especially in those more stressful times.

Jessica Armstrong (03:15):

And it’s because it’s better for your physical and mental health. It helps that you grow there. You’re better equipped to handle challenges in stressful situations or even conversations, then fewer negative emotions.

Jessica Armstrong (03:30):

And for me, it gives me that time to really process, think, feel, become more aware, and then letting go of whatever that is that I need to, in order to handle what’s in front of me with more ease and with less expectations.

Jessica Armstrong (03:53):

And ultimately, that can help with headaches. And if you’re like me, it helps with acne because we’re releasing some of those things, so we’re experiencing less stress and we’re experiencing less toxic buildup, if you will, in our bodies.

McKenzie Raymond (04:12):

Absolutely. It’s like patience feels like the antidote to this pressure, this like stress that you’re — this kind of frenetic energy that’s causing such stress that maybe it’s creating headaches or acne.

McKenzie Raymond (04:27):

And I think patience is the practice. And so often in my own life, and I think so many of our lives, we learn through contrast. So, I have had a lot of my learning of patience come through my impatience and that feeling of that aggravation, that frustration, that pushing, that fighting against.

McKenzie Raymond (04:49):

And I think that one of the things that I’ve struggled with just in my own awareness is that awareness doesn’t create the change. The change takes patience and that takes time and energy. And like you were saying, being able to kind of let go and surrender.

McKenzie Raymond (05:13):

That’s such a big part of this practice of patience, being able to really come back to the idea that, “Hey, I have done enough and my most important job right now, is to practice patience.”

Jessica Armstrong (05:30):

Right. And we really want to be more present. I mean, that’s ultimately, I think what we want out of this and being able to … I know for me being less emotionally reactive as well, feeling like I can react to situations or others’ perspectives, or the way other people work maybe.

Jessica Armstrong (05:56):

If I’m more patient and I’m listening with any of my relationships, it’s been especially good for me. And I have to say, it’s probably the best place for me to practice patience has been with my team that I have with my other business and practicing leadership and mentorship with them as well as at home with my husband and or family members even.

Jessica Armstrong (06:25):

And because ultimately, I want to feel what’s going on. I want to feel and listen to what’s going on from their side. And I really want to be open and connect more to my intuition and my love and my trust around it so that it doesn’t feel so frustrating or pressured.

Jessica Armstrong (06:52):

I don’t feel this need to defend myself or take things the wrong way because I can be present, I can know that I’ll navigate this situation. And I really want to honor the other person as well in the situation by at least hearing where they’re coming from and seeing their perspective.

Jessica Armstrong (07:14):

Because it’s important to me to know that, oh, I’m coming from a genuine place and that I’ve made a decision based on that, or I’ve had a conversation that I can walk away feeling really good about. And it builds up my confidence and my self-esteem and my ability.

Jessica Armstrong (07:37):

And that to me is really what practicing patience has given me, is just being able to see how I react to things and how can I evolve in a way that I can be a better leader, be a better partner, be a better friend even. And then of course, being better to myself as well. But it’s all kind of the same.

McKenzie Raymond (08:04):

Yeah. Thank you so much for that beautiful reflection of how patience has really touched your life in these different ways. Really what I heard in what you were describing is when you’re in like the thick of some maybe challenging conversation and patience is this slower energy, patience is taking the deep breath.

McKenzie Raymond (08:30):

And really what I heard in that is that you have been able to connect more deeply with your own heart and your own intuition when you use patience, when you kind of work together, like you said, to really be able to hear someone and be able to hear what they’re saying.

McKenzie Raymond (08:50):

So that you can come out of that situation feeling really good, feeling really grounded and connected to whatever that conversation was about, but also to that person on this really deep human, vulnerable, intimate level.

McKenzie Raymond (09:06):

So beautiful. One of the practices of patients that I have had was actually something that we learned in our life coach certification class that we both went through. And it’s the seventh step in the seven steps to positive change.

McKenzie Raymond (09:24):

So, one of those steps is enough, and the last step in those seven steps is to practice patience and praise yourself every step along the way. And I just love that because it really, I had never considered the power of that practice until I saw it in this more structured laid-out way.

McKenzie Raymond (09:50):

And so, it’s something that I’ve really been practicing more of to not only practice patience with myself here, right now, to bring me into the present, but to also reflect a little bit and give myself a little bit of self-praise of, okay, what is working right now?

McKenzie Raymond (10:09):

Because I think, at least in my experience, impatience is this like fighting against what’s working. Like I feel like I’m not able to fully accept and be present because I’m being impatient, like something I’m not fully accepting in this present moment.

Jessica Armstrong (10:26):

Oh my gosh, yeah. I can like feel that even with you saying. I can like feel that what that feels like because yeah, the impatientness, which we’ve all experienced, even if it’s in just short bursts, or really long ones.

Jessica Armstrong (10:40):

I’ve definitely had moments of time where I’ve been impatient for probably months on end. I mean, just maybe I’m not impatient for the same thing, but I just have not been able to get away from that high energy around it.

Jessica Armstrong (10:59):

And that really does begin to make things impossible and it makes things not happen because I am now stuck in this space that you just feel like you’re trapped into and you can’t get out. And you’re like, “How did I get myself into this mess?”

Jessica Armstrong (11:19):

“Like why am I feeling like this so much? Like why am I just overthinking and here I am trying to be present, or I’m trying to be in yoga, or I’m trying to do all the things that people are telling me to do and I’m still feeling just this overwhelm of impatience and it’s like vibrating in my body.”

Jessica Armstrong (11:44):

And we have to take stock of that. It’s something like you mentioned that it’s calling to us to pay attention to it and ask ourselves questions because we do have all of these amazing modalities available to us to bring us back down.

Jessica Armstrong (12:00):

However, we do have to do some of that internal work, and really asking the big questions around why am I feeling this way? And that alone will help you to gain more awareness of the presence and be able to be grateful for where you are now and say, “Hey, look at where I’ve come and where I am right now.”

Jessica Armstrong (12:28):

And understand that maybe I have to try a different way in order to start seeing things coming in. And maybe it doesn’t have to be so hard and maybe I don’t have to be thinking about it all the time. Or as we were kind of talking about that feeling of over waiting.

McKenzie Raymond (12:50):

My gosh, I love your idea of like the extended impatience. And again, it just makes me wonder how long I have said like, “This is not my virtue.” But really what I am reflecting on and open to reframing is that impatience is actually really a form of self-sabotage in so many ways.

McKenzie Raymond (13:11):

And well, that feeling of impatience, that pressured feeling that you could feel probably from me as I’m like getting worked up over here, I wonder how that does impact the nervous system, our fight or flight response, the psoas. All of these different things just like popped into my brain, our vagus nerve.

McKenzie Raymond (13:38):

And I think that even in my own yoga practice, like I definitely was the yoga student who started yoga, learning vinyasa, learning the sun salutations. I liked how that fluidity was, I really learned how to breathe with each movement. And I loved that practice.

McKenzie Raymond (14:00):

There were times when I even went to the extreme and like went to core power and just really was in that power place where now, I have shifted and while I still love teaching and practicing a good flow, a nice vinyasa, yin and restorative, to me there is just nothing like it.

McKenzie Raymond (14:24):

And that is where some of my most potent practice of patience has come because it’s like well, you’re holding these poses for minimum three to five minutes, so you’re working into the fascia, which is this connective tissue that you can’t even get into in a vinyasa flow. And it’s like that takes patience. That takes time.

McKenzie Raymond (14:47):

And then like don’t even get me started on the mental aspect of the practice, learning how to just get to a place where you really can treat every pose as if it were its final Shavasana.

Jessica Armstrong (15:01):

When I took that meditation class with you, that was a really good example. And it was interesting because I was like first, it was trying to even be comfortable in the position.

Jessica Armstrong (15:16):

And then of course with meditation. And I knew that it was going to be a long meditation. Like just that idea of having to allow that time to just be and not to be thinking about it.

Jessica Armstrong (15:32):

And eventually though, it did cross that threshold where I was in a place where maybe I wasn’t completely meditative, but I was in a place of presence where I was not noticing the time passing. I wasn’t noticing the things that didn’t feel good maybe in my body or I was just present with and feeling clear-minded.

Jessica Armstrong (16:04):

And that took a while to be sitting in that position. And it did take time for me to get to it. Like it gave me enough time to get to the point where I am actually being present and patient and the time is not something that’s bothering me.

Jessica Armstrong (16:26):

I’m not ready to go and do the next thing. I’m not thinking about what I have for the rest of the day. I’m just being there with myself.

McKenzie Raymond (16:35):

Yeah. And what a beautiful representation of having patience with yourself as well. Like it reminds me of that analogy you gave when you were running a marathon and then you stop at the finish line. It’s like you have all this energy still.

McKenzie Raymond (16:48):

And when you sit for meditation, it’s like of course your brain wasn’t just like, “Okay, I’m blissed out, I’m meditating. This is great.”

McKenzie Raymond (16:59):

It’s like the momentum was still there. There were all the other things. The list, the to-dos. And really, I think that for most of us there is this discomfort. Like you said, I crossed this threshold where it no longer became my biggest focus.

McKenzie Raymond (17:15):

But in that discomfort where I think in this masculine-driven society, patience can be extremely uncomfortable.

[Music Playing]

Jessica Armstrong (17:30):

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McKenzie Raymond (17:42):

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Jessica Armstrong (17:56):

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Jessica Armstrong (18:39):

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McKenzie Raymond (18:56):

Who knows, maybe we’ll see you there.

McKenzie Raymond (19:00):

I’m learning that maybe impatience has been my, what I thought was neutral. And in my own awareness, really recognizing that being patient, being in that space in between where we’ve let go, we don’t really know. We’re somewhere between waiting, but we’ve planted those seeds.

McKenzie Raymond (19:28):

I think that’s where also that growth kind of happens where it becomes easier next time or maybe it becomes a little bit more accessible where we can remember, I’ve been here before. I’ve made it through this threshold, I can do it again.

Jessica Armstrong (19:48):

Yes. And I know what it feels like. I know what I learned from that experience and I’m even more equipped to handle it the next time. Yeah, I love that.

Jessica Armstrong (20:01):

And so, it does, when you say that planting the seed, and since we’ve kind of passed through that harvest time and we’re coming into the winter time, I just can’t help but mention just one of my absolute favorite books.

Jessica Armstrong (20:19):

It’s The Spirit Almanac, it’s by Emma Loewe and Lindsay Kellner. And it’s a modern guide to ancient self-care. And it’s really cool because it really does go to this ancestral side of how we connect with the ebbs and flows of nature and especially with the seasons.

Jessica Armstrong (20:41):

And since patience and winter really go hand in hand, I just had to quote some of the things that they mention and their part about winter.

McKenzie Raymond (20:55):

Yes, please. I love that book. It’s so good.

Jessica Armstrong (21:00):

It’s so good. It has a bunch of rituals that you can do too and prompts and then it also just has so much information about ancient tribes and how they handle this. It’s really just great. It’s full of so many goodies.

Jessica Armstrong (21:14):

And it’s really this time to slow down and reflect. Really looking at this past year of what’s happened and really reminiscing and seeing all that’s happened to bring you where you are now. And you’re acknowledging where you are and where you want to go and really what you need to do to keep healing that inner self.

Jessica Armstrong (21:45):

So, it’s kind of we’ve got this growth that is now, starting again underneath this layer of frozenness or snow and it’s really building this magic that’s eventually going to bloom.

Jessica Armstrong (22:02):

However, if we don’t allow it to be still and we don’t give it time and we’re not patient, it’s going to have a really hard time being as bright, and beautiful, and sustainable when it comes out in the spring.

Jessica Armstrong (22:20):

So, a lot of this is really calling us to spend the winter time looking inward and really hibernating a bit. And that can be really confrontational when it comes to how we deal with coming into the new year, what’s expected of us coming up, how much did we fail from our resolutions last year?

Jessica Armstrong (22:48):

And you’re in this time of really needing to just celebrate where you are and take pause and be patient and just really spend that time learning and growing with yourself.

Jessica Armstrong (23:04):

But everything that’s around us especially in America, we’re spending that time really trying to just work and meet our expectations as quickly as possible. And that’s too much energy at that time.

Jessica Armstrong (23:24):

And we want to spend the time celebrating ourselves and not, well, we never want to obviously be negative about ourselves or shaming ourselves, but we do spend a lot of that time doing that.

Jessica Armstrong (23:37):

And that’s why we have these mental things like SAD, the seasonal affective disorder. And it’s four times more prevalent in women than it is in men.

McKenzie Raymond (23:50):

Wow, really?

Jessica Armstrong (23:52):

Yeah. And I think that’s because of the imbalance. It’s really an imbalance. Our expectations are really high during a time that we really need to be loving ourselves and caring for ourselves the most. It’s nature’s gift for us to rest, but we feel that we have expectations we have to meet.

McKenzie Raymond (24:18):

Yeah. Nature always has the most beautiful invitations to us if we are willing to slow down and listen. And it’s so interesting how winter is this time to pause and be patient and go inward and rest. And it’s also the time that I think as a society we’ve created the most stress.

McKenzie Raymond (24:42):

Thanksgiving and Christmas alone it’s like, oh, everyone just gets like taken over by this thing. It’s like it’s outside of them and they’re a victim to it.

Jessica Armstrong (24:52):

Yeah. It’s become bigger than just a gentle gathering and giving and receiving.

McKenzie Raymond (25:00):

Yeah. And I feel like patience is just like this. Like I’m coming to realize that patience is such a form of self-love and self-care.

McKenzie Raymond (25:11):

And when I am patient with myself and with others and with the world, it feels gentle and it feels loving and it feels safe. It feels like I don’t have to be anywhere but right where I am and neither do you.

Jessica Armstrong (25:34):

Yeah. Letting that coziness and even that togetherness or that just the closeness, that warmth that I think we all feel internally during these times. But it’s just those systems that have been built over time by society or the work that we do.

Jessica Armstrong (26:01):

And it’s really this thing that I love in here is that their winter rituals are all about inner rumination and quiet progress. And it really reminds you that change takes time and nothing happens overnight. While also challenging you to discover and get to know a new part of you and it’ll teach you to be kinder to yourself.

Jessica Armstrong (26:25):

And I just love this idea around that where we have heard that obviously change takes time. I don’t think that any of us are not somewhat aware that that could be true. But it’s having to accept that and that is where the challenge comes in.

Jessica Armstrong (26:45):

And doing that is going to be where the magic happens and where you start to learn about a new part of yourself. And I just love that so much. It’s really that part of self-care, like you mentioned.

McKenzie Raymond (27:01):

Yeah, I love that too. It’s like the ritual that they’re creating, it sounds like it’s creating space for individuals to create the opportunity for them to be in that discomfort where again, maybe they can build up some of that evidence where they get to cross that threshold too.

[Music Playing]

Jessica Armstrong (27:21):

Before you continue on with that thought, I’d love to take a moment to talk to you about the bliss-inducing elixir that we’ve both become quite familiar with. I’m talking about the heart-opening drink, cacao.

McKenzie Raymond (27:35):

Yes. My love, cacao. Cacao is a superfood and also the purest form of chocolate. The ceremonial drink has been used by Mesoamerican civilizations in sacred ceremony for thousands of years.

McKenzie Raymond (27:48):

In fact, cacao is considered to be of divine origin and the cacao tree was often revered as a conduit between heaven and earth.

Jessica Armstrong (27:58):

In addition to the spiritual significance of cacao, it contains many healing properties that provide feelings of stimulation and joy.

McKenzie Raymond (28:07):

Well, Soul Lift Cacao provides a variety of direct-trade cacao products. I’m biased towards Heart of the Earth blend because during my time in Lake Atitlan, Guatemala, I had the privilege of visiting this incredible women’s collective and feeling the love that is infused from bean to block.

Jessica Armstrong (28:24):

I know you’ve used cacao, mostly ceremonial. And I enjoy using cacao even to supplement my caffeine intake. Not only does cacao provide me with a more grounded stimulation, but I love knowing that my purchase is going directly towards supporting indigenous communities.

McKenzie Raymond (28:41):

Use the link in our show notes to purchase your own ceremonial-grade cacao today. Be sure to use our code Good Enough at checkout to support the show and receive a discount. Stay tuned for opportunities to indulge in this incredible medicine collectively with our virtual cacao ceremonies coming soon.

McKenzie Raymond (29:02):

I also loved how you described like the seeds that were in the winter that maybe blanketed by snow or maybe we just can’t even see them under the dirt and how these seeds are collecting energy.

McKenzie Raymond (29:16):

And it really reminded me of like these things that are kind of happening behind the scenes that maybe I can’t see that is a part of patience where just because I can’t see the seeds under the snow doesn’t mean that when spring comes, there’s not going to be all of these new blossoms. I just can’t see it right now.

McKenzie Raymond (29:37):

And I think for me that’s such a part of patience. It’s like I can so often look for some kind of validation where really patience I think takes this level of trust and surrender to be able to know that those seeds are still under there. They’re collecting their energy.

McKenzie Raymond (29:56):

And I think the more that I can kind of like be in the patience, try and trust and surrender the best that I can, I really believe that that energy can just like cultivate to its perfect, most divine place.

McKenzie Raymond (30:14):

And that I also do have to wait sometimes, I do have to be patient. That it’s natural. Change does take time and nature takes time and I get to take my time too, damn it.

Jessica Armstrong (30:29):

Yeah, because sometimes you’ve already done your part and there’s nothing left that you have to give to it and you have to trust.

Jessica Armstrong (30:38):

And that can be really hard because we have to let go of that control and that not being in control of how things change and when things come about and we’ve already done what … it’s kind of like you can’t keep checking on stuff that you have nothing else that you can give to.

Jessica Armstrong (31:00):

Because that’s just now taking more energy from you. And I think yeah, it’s giving that energy and opportunity to transmute into something new. And yeah, I love that.

McKenzie Raymond (31:18):

Well, I laughed when you said it’s like when you can’t give that energy like you’re checking. And that I was even reflecting as we were talking about doing this as one of our episode topics and how when we first were on this journey, it was like I was just dying to hear those episodes.

McKenzie Raymond (31:36):

Of course, I’m still excited. But even last night I got a notification, this new episode popped through ready for review and I’m like, “Okay.” I’m learning, I’m finding that balancer. I’m like, “I don’t have to like listen this second.”

McKenzie Raymond (31:50):

And just even in that, it’s like the patience that I’m learning that like it’s going to be there and I will get to it in perfect timing. And I think like just the releasing of that pressure, again, it’s part of my lesson and patience like in this work too.

McKenzie Raymond (32:09):

So, when you said like not keep checking, it’s like the energy I was spending just to be like, “Oh, is it up?” And then I would probably like text you and be like, “It’s up.” And you’re like, “I don’t see it. I don’t think it’s up.”

McKenzie Raymond (32:20):

And then I like made up this whole thing and now, I’m just like, “Oh, this is so much better. I can just do it. I need to be doing and trust that it’s coming on through.”

Jessica Armstrong (32:30):

Oh no, I totally get that though. I feel you. Because at first, we were like, “Yeah, when’s it going to come out? Oh, we need to make sure that we review it quickly.” But now because of the patience, we’re able to enjoy it ourselves when we get to listen to the post-production episode before it goes live.

Jessica Armstrong (32:50):

And that’s what I really love. I listened to it this morning and it just was really great. It just put me in just the best mood to get to here and now, we’re recording another one. But no, I totally get it.

Jessica Armstrong (33:05):

And it’s just a perfect validation though that now we are practicing the patience around it, that we’re getting even more from these episodes than we would if we were stressing it or pushing it or crying for it.

McKenzie Raymond (33:21):

And I mean, I really do want our show to be this invitation for people to pause and have a little self-care in their day. So, I don’t want to go into it with that pressured energy either of like, this is a task. I also want to receive it as self-care and just go sit in the sun or take a walk and listen.

McKenzie Raymond (33:41):

But yeah, one of the other things that I was reflecting on with patience was how I think so often it’s like only in hindsight we can see or what was, or how these things came together.

McKenzie Raymond (33:54):

And so, I think one of my favorite practices, if I’m catching myself being impatient about something, is to almost imagine like I’m traveling to future me and reflect back on where I am today.

McKenzie Raymond (34:08):

And to me, it just brings me such great perspective. Not only am I able to more appreciate where I am today, but often these things come to me in future me that I had never even consciously considered. Like maybe even some inconveniences that I might be dealing with in that life.

McKenzie Raymond (34:27):

And so, to reflect back and really just feel grateful for where I’m at, it drops me back into the present moment. It really reminds me that I am exactly where I need to be and that that desire can still exist. Like I’ve now, planted the seed.

McKenzie Raymond (34:46):

And now, I just have to wait for that cultivation, that energy to build up. And eventually I feel like we’ll come together on this path and we’ll reunite again.

Jessica Armstrong (35:00):

That’s beautiful. Yeah, I love that. And then I wanted to point out the waiting too and the idea of the over waiting, just because it was something that really came up to me right before we started recording. Like it was kind of like last minute.

Jessica Armstrong (35:19):

And I was like thinking how sometimes when I feel like I am practicing patience and I feel like I am all relaxed about something, but yet I’m constantly thinking about how quote unquote “relaxed” I am about it or how good at, how well I’m being patient about this.

Jessica Armstrong (35:40):

And it’s almost like this active waiting that also doesn’t have a lot of momentum with it. Like it feels like it’s holding me back almost, or it’s getting me stuck. Does that make sense?

McKenzie Raymond (35:59):

So, you’re saying that sometimes when you are being patient you catch yourself like caught?

Jessica Armstrong (36:07):

Yeah. Like I can’t do other things. Like it’s almost like it’s taking me over, but it’s like a false sense of patience because it’s awaiting, and it’s something that’s really been hard for me to describe because it’s different from being present.

McKenzie Raymond (36:27):

It honestly like reminds me of like how we have talked about addiction and how when there is someone who’s like on a sober path, but then they’re so attached to how many days they’ve been sober. It’s like everything is still about their alcoholism.

McKenzie Raymond (36:44):

It’s almost like that same energy in a way because there’s like this attachment to what is my patience getting me to?

Jessica Armstrong (36:54):

Yeah. Like the future thing. Like you’re stuck in the future. It’s like you’re still not present. You’re waiting for something and you’re missing out on the things that are coming through during that time. Opportunities, a chance to evolve in a way that’s more accepting for this thing that you’re waiting for.

Jessica Armstrong (37:16):

And I think we miss that a lot when we’re … for me, I had to really discern the difference between being present and being in an active waiting space.

Jessica Armstrong (37:29):

And I really notice better results and I’m able to accomplish more and evolve more when I’ve disconnected myself from what that is in the future. Like let’s say I’ve put everything in to what I’m waiting for, everything that I can give to it I’ve already done.

Jessica Armstrong (37:54):

So, now, I have to disconnect from it because I have to allow it to do whatever it needs to. And I need to do whatever I need to so that when we meet up again in the future, we’re both in that space. I’m ready to accept what this is built into from the energy I already put into it.

McKenzie Raymond (38:17):

Okay. Yes. I feel like this just all came together because I feel like too, something else that you’re kind of touching on is that when you and whatever the seed is that you’ve planted, come back together that you both have changed.

McKenzie Raymond (38:33):

And so, really what I’m hearing is well, yes, you’re like, okay, planted the seed or maybe there is this desire today to do this thing, or have this thing, or whatever that looks like for you. That there’s also a total detachment from it as well.

McKenzie Raymond (38:50):

Because I think when we have patience, we also have to know that when we get there, we’re going to be a completely different person. And so is whatever this energy is that we’ve put out into the universe.

McKenzie Raymond (39:02):

And so, to me, really what I heard in what you shared is yes, like having it, setting that intention, but also completely detaching from it at the same time. Because we can’t really pick and choose.

McKenzie Raymond (39:16):

Like if we’re really going to be on this path where we’re surrendering and we’re patient and we really believe that the universe has our back, I think there is this practice with patients where we also have to know that by inviting that other energy in that we have to be open to how we are going to shift and mold and change too.

McKenzie Raymond (39:35):

And so, I think like yeah, with this, whatever’s manifesting, it’s not being attached to the outcome.

Jessica Armstrong (39:43):

Yeah, yeah. And we have to allow ourselves to evolve or that thing’s going to evolve without us and it’s going to turn into something else later and we may miss that pivotable moment.

Jessica Armstrong (40:01):

It’s like we really want to bring it in. But if we’re waiting and we’re just at this stalemate and we’re not growing and we’re just waiting for the feedback, for the outcome, for the finish, whatever it is that we think it’s going to come to, that’s unfortunately not going to be what happens.

Jessica Armstrong (40:19):

Because if we aren’t growing the way we need to, what we have manifested is not going to be welcome in our space because it’s grown without us and it’s ready, it needs us to be where it is or we can’t get together.

McKenzie Raymond (40:36):

Yeah. Like waiting is certainly a more closed-off energy. Whereas I feel like patience is definitely more open. And just exactly what you were just describing reminds me of a book that I love, it’s called Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert and it talks about-

Jessica Armstrong (40:53):

Oh yes, I love that book.

McKenzie Raymond (40:54):

Yeah. Like our inspirations or like kind of how ideas, creativity, it’s just like floating out in the universe and how these amazing ideas are going to basically find their energetic match.

McKenzie Raymond (41:06):

And if it’s you and you’re ready and you’re like, “Okay.” And you align and it’s like, “Ah.” Or like you have that pivotal moment, you guys meet up again, fireworks, manifestation. But also, just like you were saying, that dream is just going to build and grow momentum.

McKenzie Raymond (41:24):

And so, if you’re waiting, I think it is this much more closed-off energy than being open and being like, “Okay, this isn’t exactly what I had in mind, but hey, this is a new pivotal idea. This is a new inspiration that just dropped in. And if I’m fully detached from it, maybe it can be even better than what I thought.”

Jessica Armstrong (41:45):

Yeah, yes.

McKenzie Raymond (41:47):

But yeah, Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert. Highly recommend. I love that book. It’s so good.

Jessica Armstrong (41:53):

Yeah. I love. Anything about like the creativity too is just, I remember when I read that God, years ago before I was even an entrepreneur. I remember I was still working at like a desk job and I was like reading it because it was like a weekend job and I just didn’t have much to do.

Jessica Armstrong (42:14):

So, I’d read books and that was one of them. My sister had recommended it. And yeah, it actually was probably a really big part in to getting my creativity going again because it had been a little stale for a while because I had been in the restaurant business for a long time.

Jessica Armstrong (42:34):

And so, even there, there’s that patience, these things that come to you out of nowhere like that.

Jessica Armstrong (42:43):

And then I had that space at the time to really invite that in and it was just one of those things that kind of put everything into motion as well. One of quite a few books and things I had listened to over the time. But yeah, that was a big one.

McKenzie Raymond (43:00):

Yeah, yeah. And just like honestly, what you were just sharing reminded me that again with like that idea of momentum, if we’re just always moving fast, if we’re in this impatience place, we’re not going to have the time or the space for an inspiration to come in.

McKenzie Raymond (43:20):

We’re going to be too busy, we’re going to be too focused on that thing that’s not manifesting for us or our own impatience or aggravation. There’s all this other energy that we’re expending. We don’t have space for creativity.

Jessica Armstrong (43:35):

It’s that boredom that I think we’ve mentioned before. It’s that getting into that space of being bored. And that’s what I was when I had this weekend job, which it wasn’t for a long time I ended up going to full-time at that same place.

Jessica Armstrong (43:49):

But I almost like really needed that time where I was like alone in the office. I just had to wait if phone calls came in or something. But for the most part, I could really read, I could sketch or write or really anything I wanted to. And I hadn’t had time like that in so long.

McKenzie Raymond (44:10):

Yeah. I mean, honestly, what a gift. I had some of those jobs too. I’m like, “Man, that is just what I needed at that time.” And again, I didn’t know it at the time. I was probably like, “Oh, when is my dream life coming? Let’s get this podcast going.”

Jessica Armstrong (44:24):

I know.

McKenzie Raymond (44:26):

And now, I’m like, “Ugh, I needed that.”

Jessica Armstrong (44:28):

All the time. It was just those little parts along the way. Yeah. Oh, I love that. I have not even thought about that in so long. So, what a cool thing to come up.

McKenzie Raymond (44:39):

Yeah. I love that.

Jessica Armstrong (44:41):

Well, what an amazing conversation, McKenzie. Like it’s just always such a pleasure. And like I love when we have conversations like this that kind of come up within the episode too, and which is really something we like to share so much with everybody.

McKenzie Raymond (45:00):

It was honestly more healing that I could have imagined, and I love that we both had some of these like epiphanies and pivotal moments even within this episode. What a great reminder that sometimes patience is the best thing we can do for ourself.

McKenzie Raymond (45:19):

I think something that I’m recognizing is maybe more often than not, patience is just this beautiful form of self-love that I can be giving to myself.

McKenzie Raymond (45:29):

And again, I just want to thank you for holding this space and meeting me right where I am and being patient with me because I’m right here learning with you and I just-

Jessica Armstrong (45:41):

We’re all good enough right where we are and we can find patience in that and …

McKenzie Raymond (45:49):

Absolutely, yeah. I didn’t even really ever connect how patience and enough is so closely tied as well. So, what a cool thing to get to kind of piece together as we’re doing that too.

McKenzie Raymond (46:04):

Thank you so much. I hope you all have a wonderful day. Enjoy this episode and we’ll catch you next time.

Jessica Armstrong (46:11):

Bye.

[Music Playing]

McKenzie Raymond (46:15):

We know this time is precious to you, and because we are insanely joyful that you are spending it with us, we always want to deliver authentic vulnerability, and dive deep into what we are feeling as a collective.

Jessica Armstrong (46:27):

Our intention is to bring you stories and guests that provide you the opportunity to discover aha moments, so you leave our conversations feeling lighter and knowing what you do today will be good enough.

McKenzie Raymond (46:40):

We love to connect. Follow us on social media by following our handles linked in the show notes. If you enjoyed this episode, share it with a friend, rate, review, and follow The Good Enough Podcast on Spotify, Apple Music, or your favorite podcast listening app, so you never miss an episode.